The Remodel

[Kathy, just in case you're still paying attention, this is for you!]

My husband and I have been undergoing a rather dramatic remodel of our home for the past six months. We ripped out many of the key elements you would want to have functioning in order to live a relaxed life -- things like the kitchen, a shower. You know, the basics.

Forget what they say about simplifying. That only works if you really get rid of everything or never had it in the first place. Life seems more complicated, not less, when all you have is a rack full of summer clothes in winter, and a small sink with no place to put your toothbrush. The kitchen in the garage I didn't mind too much. It was oddly fun to figure out how to make an omelet on a panini press or explore the possibilities of a $20 toaster oven. Besides, there's always Acqui and Starbucks...

I realize that many people live with few comforts. I've visited a number of places where poverty is the norm and people build their homes from refuse found in the nearby dump. But context is important, and in the West we're mostly used to certain comforts. I definitely appreciate what I have in a whole new way now.

As our remodel comes to a close, I can't help but think how the whole experience is a parallel for life. For example, you always start such a project with big plans, but eventually reality requires you to make adjustments.

Then there's the dust -- every part of the house is always dusty, especially the part not under construction. You can dust & vacuum on Monday and by Tuesday afternoon it's a quarter inch thick again. In life, try as you might, you'll never eradicate all the messy bits.

Relationships? Not only do you test your marriage, but you learn that not everyone has the same standards as you do for doing their jobs or executing their craft. Our contractors were quite good overall, and most of the subs were as well. But it's those situations where something goes wrong that take over in terms of time, money and frustration level.

Patience in the extreme is required to get through it all. It's exhausting to work a long day then go home and choose paint colors or cupboard doors. But you do it, knowing in the end it will be worth it. Some day, way in the future, when you will once again shower at home and look at that really cool tile you and your partner picked out.

And that's really the point...you get through it. Sometimes you even experience moments of elation as you glimpse your fantasy turning into reality. Then the day finally arrives when you move back in. You finally get to unpack your kitchen and bake a cake. Two weeks of dinners later you are sure your new kitchen totally rocks and you can pack up the crappy toaster oven for good.

Whether you are remodeling your house, your attitude or your whole life, it takes creativity, patience, perseverance, and great partnerships to get it done. I wonder what I'll learn when we redo the back yard landscape....